23- The Life of Being Gray

"Being gray is being neutral in life, often to point of being indifferent."

Life nowadays can be compared in many different things. It can be compared to a color, food, people, event, place etc. As we can see, life has so many metaphors, that's why being alive has been very interesting so far.

One of the metaphors of life is colors. As what the others said, colors gives life to people. Colors gives the utmost meaning or definition of life. Our favorite colors gives the meaning of our life. Bit what if your favorite color is colorless? Gray to be exact. Is gray considered as a color at all? Even if gray means colorless, no life and boring?

Well whatever people may say, I still love gray. Because gray was the only color whom I'm compatible with. Gray has the true definition of my life. A mixture of white and black colors, symbolizing my light and dark personalities, turning to a very boring person. My life has been very gray until now. I've been very confused about myself. I still don't whose the real me and those people around me. No one knows whose side am I. No one knows the 'real' me; even my parents don't know. Only God knows.

According to the website 'empower-yourself-with-color-psychology', gray means being motionless and emotionless. Being stable, calm and subdued. Gray shows neutrality, it doesn't take sides. Being neutral sometimes makes gray be indifferent with others. But tries its best to enlighten and save others.

As you can see, the definition of gray was exactly the same as mine. It's creepy yet amazing. It's like, we really are meant for each other.

22- What's on my Mind?

October 11, 2015, Sunday, 1:37 A.M
"What's on your mind?" 

Since I can't sleep, I will just share to you what am I thinking right now.

To: That One Person Whom I Thinking About Right Now

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After watching such pleasurable videos, I stalk some of your pictures, account and blogs. I've read all our past conversations. Having to do all of these things got me realized that I really still love you. God knows how much I'm deeply inlove with you. This is not an effect of having insomnia, but it came truthfully in my heart. Thinking that you can't be mine and I can't be yours, my tears flows. Can't handle that simple yet harsh reality. "I wish I didn't met you, so that I won't be feeling this crappy feeling." But, it's too late. Who am I to decide the time and fate noh? Maybe God wanted me to feel this, to become more human. But going too afar from being human, makes me want to be just a dead corpse.

I don't know why am I crying because of you. I thought I have moved on from what you did to me, but I guess I'm still not. The pain of leaving me, the pain of tossing aside my feelings, still didn't removed in my heart and mind. Why is it so hard for me to erase you in my life? Do you use such nullification magic or any invisible magic or defense magic? Am I just being offensive? I doubt that.

I'm just a mere friend of yours, but your special one of mine. So I can't avoid the fact that I'm getting jealous when you're showing your kinkiness because of someone. I'm mad to that person whose making you feel somehow intimate. I envy your best friends. Those people whom you always brag have marked in my mind, and mind my always says, "How lucky those low-life creatures are. Having to join the Supreme Being everytime. It must be a heavenly feeling." 

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I don't want you to be with them. I want you to be with me, you're all mine, is what I want to say. But I have limitations. Stepping aside beyond the borderline is very risky, that's why I know my limits.

You've broke too many promises and told many promisory excuses. It's very exasperating but I still accept each and those because I love you. Even if you don't loved me back, I still continue on loving with you, just why am I like this?

I always think if this world is at fault or it's just me thinking so deeply because it's the effect of 2:00 A.M madness. Even now, I still feel the pain you've carved into me. You'll probably don't know why am I blaming you for all of this shiz. If you want to know the answer, search for it. You'll probably know if you started to get bored and reminisce some part of your life. Don't be bothered apologizing to me... Because since that day you left me, I... Have....F..***** Despised you. That's why don't try to apologize because it won't change anything, you can't reset the time. I'll make you feel the despair, the sorrow and loneliness I have felt since the day you left me.

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Mark my words... Is what I want to say but I'm just kidding, I'm not going that far. I'm just being a little dramatic though. But, it's true that I have despised you ever since. For 2 years, I have been suffering to your enormous power and effect inside me. In the 2 years of our friendship, you just tossed me around, and made me exchange for a rich ugly douchebag.

Now I'm getting sleepy. I do hope that this night will make me remove my anxiety and no sense feelings about you. But even if I despise you, I really want to say this things to you:

"Hey, you know that I really love you. I thought that it would be just a friendship feeling but I think my heart won't want that. I love you, I like you. I love all everything about you. You've made tell this far because....because you were so..."

So yah, that's all! Cheers to your cold feelings for me.

21- To The One That I Fell For

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"You.... Yes you. The one who made my heart flutter, who made me stuck staring at you, made me want to live again, and made want to die again."

"You got me frozen in my tracks. Why do you have such great effect in me but I don't have an effect to you? It's so unfair, it made me look like a fool."

"It feels like I'm craving for a food or a thing that is impossible for me to have one. I can't reach your gracefulness nor even your cloth (kidding). I'm like a shadow of yours, I'm always beside you but you never care, you cannot see what I see and feel what I feel."

"When I'm wide awake, you're no trouble sleeping. When I'm all choked up, you're okay. You don't even realize that one is still inlove while you're leaving.... Oh, I'm falling to pieces."

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"You left me with no love, no love to my name. But even if these things kept on repeating and happening in my life, I'm still alive and barely breathing. But I feel so lost, I don't know what to do. Each and everyday I think of you. Holding back the tears with all my might. Because you're gone and left me standing all alone, and I know I've got to face tomorrow on my own again."

"I shouldn't feel this way but agh... I don't know what to do with it. I always think "How can something so wrong, feel so right all along? How could the time be wrong for a love to came along? How can love let it go when it has no place to go?" I can't go along pretending that love isn't here to stay."

"I see you, beside me but it's only a matter of dream and a vision of what it supposed to be."

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"If one day you wake up and find that you're missing me, and your heart starts to wonder where on the earth I could be, you'll see me...waiting.... for a shuttle bus to come and get away from you... JUST KIDDING!"

"Whatever it is you're doing right now, I do hope that you're happy with it. If you even need me for a good reason and purpose, then I'll be right here....waiting... For a shuttle bus to come and get away from you... Kidding again."

"Anyway, cheers to my warm feelings and your cold feelings!! ❤️

KANPAI !! (CHEERS!!)
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20- Best Pie

"Hey there, my beloved my bestfriend. How's your life going? I haven't seen you and talk to you for a months already. I miss you so much. 

"We were in our Kindergarten days when I first saw you. We didn't talk that much because you're so quiet and awkward... One year have passed and we became grade schoolers."

"As far as I can remember, our friendship started because I gave you a one sheet of paper. I really thanked the odds for that one sheet of paper though."

"I didn't even expect that we're neighbors. How small the world could be? I never knew that fate would want us to be more close. But I've never ever regretted that you came to my life to become my best friend."

"You're so cool in many different aspects. You're sociable, playful and funny. You look boyish, but you have the heart of a maiden."

"We're complete opposites actually. You're a little bit short, I'm tall. You're white, I'm brown (black is too much). You're pretty, I'm cute lelz. You're an extrovert, I'm an introvert. You're thin, I'm sexy lololololol.... Just kidding. But you know, being complete opposites was a good thing because we easily know the things that we should improve. All of these things were the reason why we became a perfect duo."

"We are a strong duo. No one could stop us nor win on us. We have the strongest bond than anyone else. Long distance and studies was not an option to end our friendship."

"Even if we don't see each other sometimes, you'll always remain in my heart and in my mind. And I do hope that you'll do the same thing."

"I'm very thankful to God that you became my friend and oh! We became the sweetest and the bestest pie in the world!!! "

"I hope that you'll stay the same and I wish that our friendship will last much stronger than before! I love you and I miss you. I hope to meet you and talk to you soon. Cheers!! 😁👏❤️

19- A Message For Goldilocks

"Hey there, Goldilocks. You're so sweet in every aspects, that's why many people loves you including me."

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"When I first saw you, I really thought that you're a foreigner because of your unusual cool curly hair. Before I could greet you, it took me 5 minutes to gather up my courage (because I'm bad at taking initiatives). We've shake hands, we smile with each other and greeted ourselves with 'Hi'."

"We had our first dinner and first conversation in the lounge. And in that time, I realized that you're not a full-pledge or even a half foreigner. You’re a Lucena girl, ‘laking- probinsya’ and yet you’re so rich lol! I remember our first conversation was all about being homesick and missing the homemade cooking of our mothers. You’re so easy to talk with, you’re very approachable also. You’ve even told us about your love life and its hardship.”

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“What I like about you is that you’re very approachable. You’re very open in any kind of conversations and you’re very charming too. You have a great and awesome taste when it comes to fashion and stuff (I think?), so do at the foods also. I also like the way you sing (I'm not being sarcastic here), you're voice is so adorable (pampa-good vibes) even if it's out of tune (lol, I'm sorry)."

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“Behind the cute, beautiful and adorable face lies the very deep craziness and naughtiness of your attitude. I have a lot of evidences to prove that you’re really crazy, but despite that, I still enjoy being with you. Your craziness is also infectious, that’s why we’re so noisy at the room sometimes. To be honest, sometimes I get scared (not literally) when you're 'high' or energetic, made me thought "Oh no, here she comes again." but I didn't mean that in a bad way."

Cutie :3

"You've become my teacher in LRT's and MRT's, in fashion, in malls and lots of stuff. I've learned a lot and I've discovered a lot of things because of you and I really thank you for that. It's very disturbing for me when I see you depressed or sad, because I'm used to see you being cheerful and jolly. It's more comfortable and soothing to see you smile, to hear you laugh, to make you happy." 

"We do have a little arguments sometimes, but I'm really thankful that it's not that worst. I apologize that I'm being rude and weird sometimes (or maybe always). I'm sorry for teasing and bullying you? for being small (lol). But you know, even if you're small, you're so strong. You're a strong-willed person, I could even sense justice on you. You're so innocent that it makes me really feel guilty when I'm thinking about green stuffs." 

"I do hope that you'll stay the same we we're to meet in the future. Don't forget me when the time comes that we will part ways. I won't forget you until my last breath (hanudaww? hahaha), and I do hope that you'll do the same thing (but I'm not forcing you to do so). Stay pretty, awesome, beautiful, crazy, and strong! Cheers! 

18- Eat, Sleep, Work, Dance

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“This post is for my beloved girl. Hey there, busy girl. What’s up? You’re the second girl I’ve met in college lol. You arrived late, never got a chance to know you better at that day. "Wow, she's really thin (not sexy lol)". That's my first impression to you. When I compare my thighs to yours, I got a little bit guilty." 

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 "I remember the first day, you're really a sleepy-head. Your cousin had a hard time waking you up. We still don't talk that much, because.. well of course it's the first day. But I did have the feeling that you'll be really fun to be with. And yeah... it's true. You're really fun to be with."

"We had our first long conversation when we're eating at Shakey's. You've told us a lot about yourself and it's very interesting. You're so cool at that time... because you know how to order at a restaurant (hahahaha OA). I still don't know how to order so I felt really... hmm." 

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"What I like about you is that you're really eager on what you do (weehh hahaha!). That's the reason why I can't talk to you that much? in the room? I think? Hahahahaha! I'm not sure! Well, whatever. I also like your reactions and facial expressions when you heard some hilarious stories. Your laugh is really infectious (seriously!). You do look like crazy when you laugh, but even if you're like that, you still give energy and life in us." 

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"And of course, I won't also forget my admiration to you when you eat!! You're the first girl I've ever met that can finish 8 monays in 10 minutes!! You're crazy!! I could only finish 2 monays in 15 minutes!! You never get full, and that's so amazing!! If you we're to join in eating competitions, I'll seriously bet for you and I'm sure I will win!! Hahahaha!! Just kidding... but seriously you're amazing." 

"You're a tempter, yet a satisfier. A student, yet a dancer. A sleepyhead, yet hard-working. I'm glad that I've met someone like you. Don't forget me I beg. I'll support you on whatever you do. I'm sorry if I can't help you when you're depressed. I may not be a good adviser, but I'll try my best to be the best listener."  

17- That Endearing Girl

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"You're my first. But what I meant about it is that, you're the first one I've met since the start of the  REAL journey. When I first saw you, my alter ego said "Wow, she's chubby." and I know it's kinda offensive, and I apologize for that. Your mother was more sociable and talkative than you are, made me wondered if she's my companion. During those past times, we only greet ourselves with   'Good Morning' and 'Good Bye', 'Good Night' and 'Hi'.  We've been awkward for a little but then it didn't took that long. We started talking and chatting when we are completed. But we don't usually talk if we're the only two remaining." 

"Me and your awesome blue blanket"

"I remember that night, that was our first long chat and it was all about ice cream cakes. Ever since that night, we've been continuing to deepen our friendship. We already felt comfort and happiness with each other. And truth to be told, you're the first one to knew one of my 'deepest secret yet a problem'. It's quite comfy when we talk. You never ceased to amaze and entertain me. I don't even get bored when we're together. It's like we didn't talk for 5 years, we never run out of stories, experiences, problems (of course), and moments." 

"I like the way you tell your stories. I could feel that you're really honest (weehh). You never get angry but you're easily pissed, I like that also because it's cute (lol). You're so kind, because you always lend me a helping hand (school supplies though). I like your blue blanket that looks like a wizard's cape. I like your laptop slash tablet, and I also like your color pencils. For short, I only like your things and stuffs.... just joking."

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"But seriously, you're so kind and you've never been angry at me literally (I don't know if you don't like me emotionally). Your smile is so beautiful even if you're just faking it. Your hug makes me feel at ease. Your smell (I know I kinda looked like a pervert here) is so addicting, it's like you always bath with perfume or whatever things. You're a one of a kind simple girl with a gorgeous personality."  

Cutie :3

"I'm really thankful that I met you. I learned a lot of things to you and to other companions also. I'm sorry if sometimes you don't really get me at all, because I'm weird. I'm sorry if I always tease you and poke you and some other things, it's just that you're so fluffy (lol), can't get enough with you. If the time comes that we should part ways, I do hope that you'll never forget me. Just remembering my name will be enough for me. So that when we meet again in the future, there's no awkwardness between us." 

16- SMT (Segunda Manong Tao)

"Alam mo namang ginagamit ka lang pero nagpapagamit ka pa rin. Wala eh, tanga eh."

Sa panahon ngayon, marami ka na talagang makikita ng mga taong mang-gagamit at nagpapagamit. Mga nagpapatanga at mukhang tanga. Mga taong makapal ang mukha at mga taong manipis ang mukha. Mga nang-aabuso at nagpapa-abuso. Bakit nga ba ganon mag-isip ang isang tao? Bakit nauso ang mang-gamit ng TAO? Nagsawa na ba silang gumamit ng BAGAY at napag-isipan na lang nilang mang-gamit ng TAO?

Sabi nga nila, bawat pangyayari ay may rason o may dahilan. "So ibig sabihin may dahilan kung bakit nang-gagamit o nagpapagamit ang isang tao?" Oo naman.Walang nangyayaring pangyayari (ang gulo eh) na hindi nabibigyan ng dahilan. LAHAT ay may dahilan, LAHAT may rason. Kung sinabi man ng isa na kaya trip nya lang ang gawin ang bagay, nagsisinungaling lang siya. Pero ang pino- point out ko nga pala dito ay yung mga reasons kung bakit nagpapagamit ang isang tao.

1. Masyadong mabait.
May ibang tao na sobrang bait talaga, na hindi nila kayang makita yung isang kaibigan nila or isang stranger na nahihirapan. Kaya naman kesa sa tulungan ang sarili nila, mas inuuna nila yung kapwa nila.

2. "Mahal ko siya eh" 
Maraming gantong tao ngayon. Lahat gagawin nila para mapasaya, mapa-impress yung mahal nila. Lahat ng utos ni crush, gagawin talaga nila lahat. Kahit pa mag mukha silang tanga.

3. "Shunga"
May mga tao nga lang talaga na tatanga-tanga (sorry for the word though). Halatang- halata na ginagamit na sila, hindi pa rin nila nararamdaman. Akala nila ang tingin pa rin sa kanila ay kaibigan yun pala ginagamit lang pala sila. Nakakaasar yung mga gantong tao pero hindi mo rin kasi sila masisisi eh. May iba talaga na gagawin ang lahat para lang ma-maintain yung friendship nila, nakakaawa lang.

Marami pang mga rason kung bakit nagpapagamit ang isang tao, pero sa tingin ko eto yung mga pinaka-common.

15- This Love

"There's a weird pleasure in loving someone who doesn't love you."

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Many people have been experiencing an unrequited love. But what is unrequited love? According to research, unrequited love or one-sided love is love not that is not openly reciprocated or understood as such by the beloved. The beloved may not be aware of the admirer's deep and strong romantic affection or consciously reject it. It is the love that is not returned. Whether you are the one who loves or is loved, it can be painful experience. The hurt is real but you're not alone.

This love have been part of our humanity. We can't consider ourselves human if we don't experienced this kind of love. I, myself have also this kind of love and also an unconditional love. Wiz Khalifa said "The worst feeling is pretending you don't care about something, when really it's all you seem to think about." Sometimes, you just gotta be your own hero and save your own little heart. Because sometimes, the people you can't imagine living, can actually live without you. I just want to share my experience on this love.

I've devoted all of my life in that love. When I tend to fall on someone, I knew that it's only me who'll be making a move. I still don't receive the kind of love that I'm wanting (I'm preferring to the partner-kind of a relationship). But as the bible said. there is a time for everything.

I knew from the very start that I will only hurt myself, but then I couldn't stop myself on loving that person. I tried so many times, but still I can't. I'm confused, pissed, agonized and exasperated. I can't live my life without loving someone, don't know why.

If I started to fall on a person (obviously), I'll do anything to make them happy and satisfied. Sometimes, I imagine if they could fall on me also, but it's just an imagination so. I find myself so frustrated and wanting, but I think it's kind of a common to us. Seems that it will always be like a domino. I fall for them, they fall on the other, that's just how life goes on. There's just only a pinch of chance that the person you love will fall on you also.

Even if my mind always imagine that things that I would love to do with my loved ones, I still don't push my limit to be really the one for my love. Because I have this kind of feeling that I shouldn't be on that borderline. I have the feeling that if I push myself hard, something bad will happen. And I don't want that to happen of course. So, whatever you say and think, I think that being friends will be fair enough for me to handle. Although sometimes, I'm hurt when they are intimately with someone, but who am I to stop them. I'm just a mere friend, and so I thought it would be.

I can't help but to give them my unconditional love. I accept the fact that they will never fall for me. I just don't expect such things. Only God will be the one to decide, and I just have to wait and be patient. Even though my heart have been pierced, crushed, and have been broken. Still, it won't stop me for giving my love on them. Because that's just how my life goes on.

As what Johnny Depp said, "You can close your eyes to the things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel." 

14- Surviving First-term in APC

"How was your first term in APC?" 

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We've survived! Whoo! First term is now done!! Goodbye English Term!! Hello Programming Term!! Hello Math and Physics Term huhuhu~~ anyway, let's just celebrate for the term-break. 

June 3, 2015, the day wherein the start of struggles came. The day that made me realize that I should be working for my English speaking skills. I was really surprised that our term was an All-English term. At the very first, I thought it would be easy, because it's just English. Just all about parts of speech, figures of speech, nouns, singular or plural, constructing of sentence, reading comprehension.

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But I've awakened, from a long sleep, from lethargy and realized that I should start moving and practice my English speaking skills. It's been a hard time for me to adjust in this kind of environment, really. Especially if in every meeting, there's always an public speaking activities (ugh!). Hearing my block mates' speeches made me really nervous and anxious about myself because they are really good at speaking English. Some had a great fluent of speaking, some are just speaking casually but it's still great. In every single day, I started to hate public speaking. They are much more worst than a bunch of age problems and formulas in Mathematics, more tiring than in Physical Education and much brainstorming than Science. We always do the cramming (well of course, it's pretty common for students) even though we really want to stop this kind of habit.

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And in my first-term journey, we also encountered the struggles of writing a bunch of essays. When we heard that our Technical Writing class won't be discussing anything, we felt a little happiness because we really don't want to listen in boring discussions. But then, we regretted those things that we have felt when we started writing non-stop of essays. And just like the other public speaking classes we are attending, in every single day, we will write essays or share some current events that have been happening to the world and to our country. Oh, I really hated it.

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Not just the public speaking and the writing of essays that I really hate but also understanding such confusing instructions in my Expository Writing class. Every time that our professor will tell us to do something, she will give confusing instructions. And when we ask her to repeat for one more time, she already forgotten it and start from the beginning again and it's so frustrating! She even put a mathematical logic on her final examination which made us think "Why do we answer such Math logic, when this is an English class?". Such irony have been made on that time, and made my mind really grrrr...

But despite all the hard times, I've still appreciated the moments that I've experienced for the past 3 months. I learned how to speak English quite well (I think? haha), and learned how to write a good essay. All those things that made us suffer, make us more great and skillful than we've ever imagined. Such moments happens for a valuable reason, and that valuable reason should keep us be more inspired in everything we do.

Although, I'm happy that for the meantime our All English-Term struggles came to an end, I still can't stop the fact that I will miss the moments that I've experienced in that term. And I'm really thankful to the teachers that had taught us great lessons and gave us real struggles... I mean real projects.

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13- Preparation for Zombie Apocalypse

"When there's no more room in HELL, the dead will walk the EARTH."

Have you ever imagined yourself as Bill or Zoey from the game Left 4 Dead, or Glenn from the TV series "The Walking Dead"? Do you felt some blood thirst after playing or watching them? Do you want to be like them?

I know most of you wanted, because they seem so cool. But then, we couldn't be like that if we don't know the ways of being a survivor. So here am I, to tell you some tips and advice on how to be a certified zombie survivor:

1. Establish a safe house:
First and foremost, you have to establish a safe house. You can stock your supplies and weapons there. It's much safer than staying outside and play tag with zombies. It would be better if you put some traps around it.

2. The supplies:
Stocking of supplies is really important. Buy many as you want, because you might not have the chance to buy some food supplies again. Buy the ones that are really important like food, water, candles and some medicines.

3. Communication systems:
Charge all of your gadgets as early as possible. Better if you have a radio because sometimes we can't make use of phones due to poor signals.

4. Choosing of weapons:
Choose weapons that are silent like sniper rifles or pistols with silencer. Others don't recommend machine guns and rifles for zombie killing because their gunshots are too loud. If you were to kill one zombie, you will trigger some other zombies and you've just make yourself their happy meal.

5. Ammunition:
Make sure you have lots of them in your basement and in your pockets. It might be heavy for you when you run but it's better to have one rather than ran out of ammo and you have no choice but to run.

6. Handling weapons:
Also, make sure that you are good at handling any kind of weapons. It might be easy for games, but then on the reality it's not easy as you think. You cannot kill a zombie if you don't put much effort and strength on you weapon.

7. Clothing and footwear:
Analysts recommend to wear a long-sleeved shirt and some pants. It will protect your skin from predators and also from the sun and treacherous terrain. In footwear, make sure you wear boots. Much better if combat boots, tennis shoes or snickers. You may have to break a dead sprint at any time. Don't wear flip flops or heels, you're committing suicide!!

8. Planning an escape plan:
If you knew that there's a way to escape the apocalypse then come up with a plan. And if for some odd reason your house isn't safe to stay in, you'll need to get out as soon as possible. But then, if you can stay in your house, you should.

9. Improvised weapons:
If you can't afford to buy firearms, you could use kitchenware like frying pans, stoves, spoon and fork. It might look stupid when you use this but it's not bad as you think. Don't be bothered on using them just because they are simple. Simple weapons are the most powerful.

10. Be positive and brave:
Probably the hardest way to do but then it's an effective way to survive longer. I didn't say that you should be happy for what's happening. Just don't panic and stay positive.

We can't be sure when the zombie apocalypse will occur. But it's best for us to know about it and prepare before it's too late. These ways could also help us not just in zombie apocalypse but in other situations also. Once you've learned how to be independent, how to fight and how to manage the situation. I assure you that you will be the last man standing. This will be all about my post for today and MAY THE ODDS BE IN YOUR FAVOR.

12- Chums

"How does it feel to have a true friends?"

Friends, also known called as a companion, familiar, buddy, comrade or chum. But let me choose "chum" because it sounds so cute. Anyway, these are the people who are willing to help you at anytime you need, and they DON'T LEAVE YOU WHEN YOU'RE AT THE VERGE OF DANGER. They Fight for you, Respect you, Include you, Encourage you, Need you, Deserve you, and Stands for you.

http://friendshipblogss.weebly.com/uploads/3/1/3/2/31329113/8734900_orig.jpg

To be honest, not all of the people that I've talked and met are really my friends. Some are just acquaintances, some are just... you know...clingy or just taking advantage of me. We all do have these kinds of friends... friends that really ENDS. Friends that has an expiration date. Friends that doesn't really look you as a friend. We all have these kinds...

http://orig02.deviantart.net/029e/f/2013/092/b/f/cute_anime_couple_by_angelwing765-d6092jz.jpg

Based on my experiences, having friends are really easy. You just talk to someone, amuse them, make your presence stronger then POOF! you're friends. But to find a real friend is pretty hard, because you have so many FRIENDS. But then according to a quote, your true friends will be revealed when you have encountered hard times. And it's very true and I'm shocked that it's not too many. It made me somehow, disappointed because those people who I thought are my real friends, are the ones who are really not. But despite of disappointment, I still appreciated my real friends, and I'm really glad that even though it's not that many, it's better than nothing.

I feel so amused, comfortable, happy and free when I'm with my chums. Having them, is pretty enough for me. I just want a person who could help me when I'm in a hard time, having fun with me, brave enough to introduce me as a friend, and the most important (for me)... I just want a person who will never forget me even if we don't see each other. Having to notice my presence will make me really happy. I know it's kinda shallow but it's really really important to me. Because I've experienced to be forgotten in so many times, and I've hated that. I'm sick of it.

It's more painful to be forgotten by a friend rather than breaking up with your boyfriend/ girlfriend, well that's my opinion though. The memories you've shared with your friends are much more different than the moment you could get to your partner.



I'm really grateful and thankful to God because He had given me a lots of wonderful and real friends in my life. And because of them and also my family of course, part of my life have been meaningful and colorful. They've given me hope and strength to move on. I cannot imagine my life without my friends, that's too drastic.

SIMPLY FRIENDS (credits to: Photoscape)

11- NO SMOKING

"APC's anti-smoking campaign (Are you a smoker or not)"  

"Are you a smoker or not?" Of course, no! That's why I'll support the campaign of our school (Asia Pacific College's anti-smoking campaign). And I'll tell you what and why. 

http://www.bridgewaybh.com/wp-content/uploads/3-excuses-for-smoking-1.jpg

Smoking is a practice in which a substance is blazed and the subsequent smoke took into be tasted and ingested into the circulation system. Meaning it is really harmful to our body. But even if it's still harmful to our body, why do some people still continuing to smoke? Pretty ironic isn't it?

Back in 1000 BC, people (Mayans to be exact) used tobacco leaves in smoking and chewing also. They used this for shamanistic and medical purposes. Nowadays, smoking is used for pastime, for movies, and also for making themselves cooler. This is how great the smoking had influenced us.

http://inhabitat.com/wp-content/blogs.dir/2/files/2011/03/cigarette-butts.jpg

According to what I've observed in my surroundings, it's not only the people who are in danger but also the nature. Because according to research, smoking affects the environment the most, resulting into air, water and land pollution. And did you know that because of excessive use of cigarettes, many trees are being cut down. In an hour, cigarette producing unit requires right around 4 miles of paper for moving and bundling of the cigarettes. Just to deliver 300 cigarettes, one tree is being lavished for the production of the cigarettes as well as the chemical wastes from the manufacturing unit is likewise dumped into dirt. Subsequently, it is clear that the cigarettes are in total adding huge strain on the body and also to the environment.

http://www.mb.com.ph/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/403.jpg

Really, smoking is up to no good. They make people's health be weak, destroys the environment and yet others still continued smoking. Ugh! I feel like I want to be on beast mode right now!! How heartless are those people who don't even care about the environment and for their health also. The Philippines had implemented that the liquor and cigarettes will be much expensive but still many people (even those whose moneys are at stake) kept on buying just for the sake of their own satisfaction.


If only the people will stop smoking and drinking, I wonder how great our world will be. But I know that, stopping the smoking habits is really hard, because your used to it. My father told me so, because he experienced how hard to stop smoking. Because it's pretty normal now for him to get cigarettes every time, and for him it's part of his daily time. Just like us teens, we can't complete the day without surfing the net, play games, or login to Facebook. But then, in all those hardships that he have encountered, he managed to stop smoking for the sake of his health, and we are really happy for him. It's really a big achievement not just for him but also for us.

What I meant is, it's not too late to stop smoking. And if you really have a HEART then, you should realized by now how worse can the smoking do. Stop smoking when you still have a chance, don't wait for a disease to come because you'll regret it sooner or later. But then, if you cannot really stop yourself then don't just smoke daily, smoke once a week or twice a month... just don't smoke daily and I think you'll be okay.

http://wishesmessages.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/Inspirational-quote-for-smokers-to-quit-smoking.jpg

Credits to:
http://smoking.ygoy.com/smoking-and-the-environment/
http://www.cancercouncil.com.au/31899/uncategorized/a-brief-history-of-smoking/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smoking

10- A Little Something About Myself

"What is your hobby? Why do you enjoy it?"

Every person has their own personal hobbies, likes and dislikes. Even if your're the busiest person in the world, you still have hobbies. Hobby helps us to get rid with our boredom and it's also the time to enhance your abilities (some people does that).

Today, I want to share a little something about myself, since the blog topic said so (that's what she said).
I hope that when I shared to you my hobbies, you'll realize that you have your companion (di ka nag-iisa) realization (lol).

http://www.funnyordie.com/lists/1d2da3358d/the-best-dancing-gifs

1. Dancing
I usually dance INSIDE my room, not in PUBLIC I don't have the guts to do that. I'm not an oh-so-great dancer though but I really love to dance. I watch some of Vocaloid dance covers, sometimes I search K-POP dance covers. I'm not only dancing for pastime but also to burn fats (you know, since I'm fat and such). I really enjoy dancing alone though, it's really awkward if their someone joins you. I usually locked my room so that no one will enter unexpectedly.

2. Listening to music

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/

The common and also my favorite hobby. Oh I really love to music! It makes my mind be relaxed. Every time I listen to music, I walk around in my own world. Sometimes, when I'm lonely, I listen to sentimental music (I know you think that I should've listen to happy music so that I won't be more lonely). I prefer to listen in sentimental music because I couldn't cry in bad situations (DRAMA MODE): Every time I get hurt, I can't help myself but to smile. I really don't know why, I wanted to cry but I can't. So, to pour out those feelings, I listen to sentimental music. And it's effective (lol)... I might look weird but it's my hobby so.. I know that you also do that.

3. Surfing the net/ Playing PC Games/ Editing Photos

Photoshop Sample- Me and Gasai Yuno from Mirai Nikki

This is really my hobby, I can't endure a day without surfing the net in the computer or in mobile (but I can endure the day without playing games though). I usually read manga, watch anime and youtube videos, play games online and offline, open facebook, gmail, yahoomail, moodle, microsoft mail ,etc. Sometimes, I open my Skype and see if my friend "Kuro" (remember her? at 4- Me, Myself and I ). She's in Japan so I'd rather chat or call her with her (sarcastic tone) oh-so-handsome boyfriend. And sometimes, I use Photoshop for pastime. I've got a hard time learning to use the Photoshop but somehow I've manage to adopt it.

4. Playing guitar/ Composing songs
If I really have the chance to surf the net or play games then I go for plan B and that is to play guitar. This hobby also helps me to polish my skill in playing guitar. Sometimes I play if I'm hurt (may malahugot na na nangyari), or even compose a song that based on my experience. I have a 5 composed songs so far, 3 English songs, 1 Tagalog song and 1 Japanese song (oh don't get the wrong idea, my friend Kuro translated it, I don't know Japanese language, currently learning though). 

5.  Doodling/ Drawing
Sometimes, I really want to make some mess with my head through doodling. I'm not good at it, but mehh who cares anyway. I usually get some ideas on the current events that have been happening recently or on what have happened to me (love, friendship, educational, mental, physical problems). Or if I'm not in the mood to doodle then I draw anime characters. I usually watch some tutorials in youtube and applying it at the same time. I had time to learn about drawing anime, sometimes it really frustrates me and always think "How does she/he do that? I followed all the steps but why is it like this?". But, eventhough it's like that, I still managed to draw some quite-good-enough drawings.

This is me cross-dressing. It's pretty LIMITED! 

6. Cross-dressing
Before I explain this, I want you to know that the reason I do this because of curiosity (not a lesbian's reason). Of all the hobbies I have, this is the most interesting and weird. I usually do this PRIVATELY and not in PUBLIC. And to due to the likes of Japanese culture, I've got the urge of trying this one. It's very difficult to make-up yourself in a boyish way (coz I'm a girl), and more likely I don't really use make-ups so when I've tried this, I really got a hard time but... I think it went well in the 5TH TRY haha!

We all have different hobbies. Some may be common or others are really extra ordinary. But then, what's the same on having hobbies is that, we do this kind of things because we want it, we like or love it, we are bored and many reasons. Us people, shouldn't criticize the likes of others. They like doing it so bare with it, don't stop them though.

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/c7/67/77/c76777a5ae427759bcab70597ef13025.jpg

9- A Time For Yourself

"Being distant from everyone else is not a terrible thing." 

Some people said that being alone is bad or not a good thing. It will feel you more miserable; it will make you anti-social or become an introvert. But then, on the other hand; being alone is not really a bad thing because being alone can help you in many ways.

http://brotherword.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/AskBrotherWord-Together-Alone.jpg

Being alone will help you to be more responsible or independent on things because you do things alone and you’re used to work on some activities by yourself. Well, it doesn’t mean that you’re being selfish. It’s just that, there are things that you must do on your own. Some people think that it is much faster to finish a work by yourself rather than being in a group. Maybe that group is lacking teamwork and cooperation. Being alone helps you to reminisce good memories that will make you inspired or eager to finish your work or whatever activity. Well, that depends on the person because some uses this time of being alone to commit suicide or anything. Being distant from everyone else can help us energize ourselves. Often times when we’re surrounded by other people, we’re expending a lot of energy.

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Trying to keep others happy, make them laugh, soothe their egos, read their emotions, and all the other rigors that come along with regular interaction. It can be mentally draining if you’re constantly connected to many people. A little alone time lets you recharge and take a break from the emotionally and mentally taxing job of constant interaction. Being alone gives you the perfect opportunity for a little self reflection. Our life is always moving at a crazy fast pace. So fast in fact, that it’s probably rare when you have a moment alone to sit and reflect on your life. Since we aren’t spending too much time processing the thoughts and feelings of others, it’s the best time to turn your focus inwards. Being alone will help you get in touch with our own emotions. 

When we’re surrounded by other people all the time, we’re trying to read, and cater to, the other person’s emotions. So much so, that you could end up losing touch with your own. When you start to enjoy being alone, you’ll gain a greater perspective for your own emotions. You’ll create a deeper understanding of what makes you happy, what upsets you and what saddens you. With that, it’s much easier to regulate your emotions. 

But it all starts with understanding how you feel, and that comes from a little bit of solitude. You’ll start doing things that you actually enjoy if you’re alone. When you’re in a company of people, you’re always making compromises in order to find a solution that the entire group can enjoy. And unfortunately, the things you want most, may not always line up with what the group wants. So it’s better to enjoy being alone once you realize that doing so gives you more freedom to do things you actually want to do. When you start to enjoy being alone, you’ll quickly see that solitude means you don’t have to keep apologizing for what you’ve done. 

So often, we do things that end up upsetting other people, or hurting someone else’s feelings, and then have to quickly apologize for it. But when you’re alone, you don’t have to apologize for anything. And that takes a lot of pressure out of most situations. You get to stop second guessing everything you say, or every move you make because you’re afraid someone is going to be offended, or saddened, and angered. 

“The best part about being alone is that you really don’t have to answer anybody. You do what you want.” – Justin Timberlake

And to sum up, solitude could help us in many ways. It doesn’t mean that you’re anti-social or whatever if you’re alone. It’s just that it’s much easier and better to be alone rather than being in a crowd. 

8- SOCSIT Week

"Even the darkest night will end. The sun will rise. - Les Miserables"

Finally! The Mid-term Examination is done! Time to prepare for the Final Examinations! But, we should relax a little bit before we engage ourselves for another hellish studies and many stuffs.

Last July 28, we celebrated the week for IT students or most likely called the SOCSIT week. Lots of seminars, competitions and fun activities have been prepared on this week. This week have been a stress-reliever for IT students because it’s the end of the midterm examinations. However, not all IT students have the chance to participate because of their classes and due also to many assignments and projects.

           

On the same date, July 28, 2015, IT students have been told to go at the parking lot and attend the opening ceremony of the SOCSIT week. All of the IT courses and all of the year including juniors are in the ceremony. At that time, we showed our wonderful made banners and they showed the representatives for the Mr. and Ms. SOCSIT 2015. We also have our wonderful parade by walking around the parking lot.

            

The next day, July 29, 2015, there’s a Microsoft Roadshow at the Cafeteria, Sportsfest at the Gymnasium, Packet Tracer Competition at Room 502, IT Quiz Show and 30 seconds of fame and shame in the Auditorium. Lots of fun and remarkable memories have been made on this day especially to those who have participated in 30 Seconds of Fame and Shame. Few have been chosen as the fame and lots are in the shame side. There’s also the test of brains and teamwork happened in IT Quiz Show, and three of our classmates have participated. Luckily, they won 2^nd place at the IT Quiz show and they got 100 pesos gift check from Krispy Kreme.

           

July 30, 2015 was the day for workshops and seminar. There’s also a sushi-eating competition at the cafeteria at that time. We attended the UX MNL Workshop at Room 415, and we learned how to make a journey map. This map helps us to determine the needs and the feelings of the customers. This are useful for those people who are planning to build their own businesses. By making a journey map, they can easily satisfy what their customer needs. Also, in this day, the Mr. and Ms. SOCSIT occurred. There are a lot of participants who’s really good especially in talent portion and the beauty portion. In the Q & A portion, they were some people who really have showed their utmost confidence on answering the question.  

            

And the last day of SOCSIT Week, July 31, 2015, was the most-awaited day for IT Students. Because the Color Run, LOL Tournament, Scavenger Hunt and SOCSIT Night have been scheduled on this day. Many activities, competitions and seminars have been prepared for this day and many students enjoyed these things. Especially the SOCSIT Night wherein the students have the chance to meet-up and mingle with other IT students too. They have the chance to get wild and enjoy dancing while eating chips.

            

This, SOCSIT week have been a memorable week for every IT students that have participated. They’ve used the opportunity to have some fun and relieve themselves in stress. This special week will be just once and might not have the chance to be happening again. 

7- The Bullies

"Why do other people love to bully others?" 

Bullying. Bullying have been part of our life as a human. Everything around you have bullies. Everyday, there will be an incident of bullying. Just why? Just why those other people love to bully? Do they have reasons? Are they bored of their life?

https://abandonedfactory.files.wordpress.com/2012/04/apollon-2-4.png

Bullies always tries to search for people who they could overpower, because they think that a person won't do anything about it. They always target the weak people, the powerless people. Why don't they just bully the same level as them?

Well, there are many reasons why a person bullies other people. And I will share to you 5 reasons why a person bullies:

http://www.scholastic.com

1. Social issues
People gets more social recognition for negative behaviors than for positive ones. Also, jealousy and envy and lack of personal and social skills to deal with such feelings can also be a reason why a person bully. People think that they are cool if they were to bully other people. They want to be recognized, that's why they bully.

2. Having power
The reason why a person bullies is because they have power and authority. They want to wield their power in a noticeable way. But it's also true that people may be given power without being trained in the leadership skills that will help them wield it easily.

http://aubreydaniels.com/pmezine/sites/aubreydaniels.com.pmezine/files/Bullying.bmp

3. The Bully's Personal History
A person bullies other people because they wanted them to know the pain they have experienced. It's more like a revenge and you do it to others. Because some bullies have been bullied also in their past time, and they suffered a lot from it. And then the day come to them, and they've changed.  They want other people to suffer also.

http://urban-echo.co.uk/

4. Family issues
Families that are not warm and loving and in which feelings are not shared are more likely to have children who bully, either within the family home or in other places in which children meet others. It is also prone to produce bullies when discipline and monitoring are inconsistent and a punitive atmosphere exists.

5. Reflection of their own self-worth
Low self-esteem may not be the leading cause of why people bully, but it is still an important reason to consider. Some people have experienced bullying by their peers themselves and then turn around and do it to someone else in order to feel better about themselves. They seem to feel the ability to show power over someone else because it will prove their self-worth to others.

Bullying happens not just because a person is bored or something. It's just that they have their own personal problems. Maybe, they don't intentionally want to bully other people, but because of their friends' influence, they are forced to do it. Sometimes, we should be considerate of them too. We could might help them as well. But, for those who are bullies. Don't take this as an advantage. You might get punish or you'll end up regretting consequences...

Remember:

http://41.media.tumblr.com/7a0c112d7836232707b8d17a015218c2/tumblr_mpmifhHFk31s942x1o1_500.jpg

6- Maintaining Happiness

"Keeping yourself happy"

What a nice topic we have here today! It could also be related to our last topic. "Smile At Your Own Risk

Ah happiness, what is happiness? According to research, happiness is a emotional state of well-being defined by positive emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. Happiness comes in your own actions and it's not something that's ready made. The best happiness you could ever feel is that the ones you're not expecting (did'ya get it?). It is not made to hide and to be fake. It is made to change a person from depression to contentment.

Most of us wants to be drown deeply in solitude because they have given up on making themselves happy. But then, for those people who are like that. "PLEASE, DON'T GIVE UP!". There's still light upon the vast darkness. No matter how miserable you are feeling at the moment, if you look back, there have surely been events in your life that have made you happy. When good things happen, we feel positive emotions- like excitement, relief, pride and of course happiness. These feelings are essential for our well-being.

But the problem is, happiness doesn't actually last. Psychologists call this phenomenon hedonic adaptation- the idea is that no matter how good something makes us feel, most of the time we get to back where we started. But then again, there is still some ways to avoid this kind of phenomena:

www.linkedin.com

1. Look at the man in the mirror
You must be true to yourself. Build your life on solid ground. Be concern, not only to the happiness of the others but also to yours. Get to know with yourself first than other. You might make others happy, but what about yourself? Are you feeling happy too? So that's why it's important to reflect yourself for you to able to maintain your happiness.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/

2. Seek a contented mind 
In order for you to maintain happiness, you should find contentment to yourself. We all have a conscience that says, somewhere deep inside us, does not feel right. Be sure to listen to it. If you're not contented with your life, then you'll not be able to feel true happiness.


3. Take action steps to change your life

www.nafme.org

Do what you need to do to have the kind of life you want. You have to move in order for you to find happiness. Sitting there and staring will gain you nothing but solitude. There's no person (happy person) who are just sitting and staring (unless you're "high" or "crazy"). They always do something that will satisfy themselves. They will do anything, in order for them to be happy. So you should do like that also. Join your friends, don't be so KJ (kill joy). I know you can do it!

 4. Be patient, a fast life is not usually a real life
"Don't rush things." as our Technical Writing professor said. Just be patient. Nothing will be good and successful if you rush things too much. Especially when it comes in finding your partner.Those people who are bitter and saying "WALANG FOREVER!!" are the ones who have rushed in a relationship. They ALWAYS THOUGHT that he's/ she's the ONE.(Maraming nawawala sa maling akala!!) And they will give everything for that person and in the end, they will break up. Well it's because they rushed things too much. Even if you feel that you love him/her already, it doesn't mean that you will give everything to him/her. It's like you stab a knife at yourself. Learn to wait, don't be bored. Always think positively and excitedly.

5. Give up perfectionism
If you insist on perfection, you will unavoidably suffer on poor self-esteem. After all, whatever you did, you could have done better. But the thing is if you want to get everything done then you are going to let some things go- even if they are not perfect. Happiness doesn't occur in a perfect plan. Sometimes, those unexpected moments or plans are the most memorable happiness that happened to you. You know, just go with the flow.