6- Maintaining Happiness

"Keeping yourself happy"

What a nice topic we have here today! It could also be related to our last topic. "Smile At Your Own Risk

Ah happiness, what is happiness? According to research, happiness is a emotional state of well-being defined by positive emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. Happiness comes in your own actions and it's not something that's ready made. The best happiness you could ever feel is that the ones you're not expecting (did'ya get it?). It is not made to hide and to be fake. It is made to change a person from depression to contentment.

Most of us wants to be drown deeply in solitude because they have given up on making themselves happy. But then, for those people who are like that. "PLEASE, DON'T GIVE UP!". There's still light upon the vast darkness. No matter how miserable you are feeling at the moment, if you look back, there have surely been events in your life that have made you happy. When good things happen, we feel positive emotions- like excitement, relief, pride and of course happiness. These feelings are essential for our well-being.

But the problem is, happiness doesn't actually last. Psychologists call this phenomenon hedonic adaptation- the idea is that no matter how good something makes us feel, most of the time we get to back where we started. But then again, there is still some ways to avoid this kind of phenomena:

www.linkedin.com

1. Look at the man in the mirror
You must be true to yourself. Build your life on solid ground. Be concern, not only to the happiness of the others but also to yours. Get to know with yourself first than other. You might make others happy, but what about yourself? Are you feeling happy too? So that's why it's important to reflect yourself for you to able to maintain your happiness.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/

2. Seek a contented mind 
In order for you to maintain happiness, you should find contentment to yourself. We all have a conscience that says, somewhere deep inside us, does not feel right. Be sure to listen to it. If you're not contented with your life, then you'll not be able to feel true happiness.


3. Take action steps to change your life

www.nafme.org

Do what you need to do to have the kind of life you want. You have to move in order for you to find happiness. Sitting there and staring will gain you nothing but solitude. There's no person (happy person) who are just sitting and staring (unless you're "high" or "crazy"). They always do something that will satisfy themselves. They will do anything, in order for them to be happy. So you should do like that also. Join your friends, don't be so KJ (kill joy). I know you can do it!

 4. Be patient, a fast life is not usually a real life
"Don't rush things." as our Technical Writing professor said. Just be patient. Nothing will be good and successful if you rush things too much. Especially when it comes in finding your partner.Those people who are bitter and saying "WALANG FOREVER!!" are the ones who have rushed in a relationship. They ALWAYS THOUGHT that he's/ she's the ONE.(Maraming nawawala sa maling akala!!) And they will give everything for that person and in the end, they will break up. Well it's because they rushed things too much. Even if you feel that you love him/her already, it doesn't mean that you will give everything to him/her. It's like you stab a knife at yourself. Learn to wait, don't be bored. Always think positively and excitedly.

5. Give up perfectionism
If you insist on perfection, you will unavoidably suffer on poor self-esteem. After all, whatever you did, you could have done better. But the thing is if you want to get everything done then you are going to let some things go- even if they are not perfect. Happiness doesn't occur in a perfect plan. Sometimes, those unexpected moments or plans are the most memorable happiness that happened to you. You know, just go with the flow.

5- Smile At Your Own Risk

http://orig12.deviantart.net

"Faking happiness"

Yeah! Now we have an interesting topic here and I think that most of us are experts in this (AM I RIGHT?!). Fake happiness, fake smiles, forced smile, Pan Am smiles, butox smiles whatever they call it. We're using these for covering up problems, to make others happy, make ourselves be deep in lies, and the best term to call for a person like that would be a "COWARD". We are afraid to be seen if we are depressed. We want to cheer up those people who are depressed even if you're also in that situation. Faking happiness can help many people but it can't help ourselves. We can't just be honest with our feelings and we're also afraid of getting noticed by other people. Just why? Why are we afraid of telling them the truth? Is it because they are not trustworthy? Is it because you don't want to be a bother to them? We should think about these questions and realize that also.

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com

Let me tell you about this friend of mine who is not good at hiding her true feelings (bad at lying for short). You can tell easily that she's sad or angry. Every time I ask her what's her problem she always says "I'm okay, I don't have any problems at all." and other excuses. But it's totally obvious that she's in pain or something so why did she want to hide it even though she can't? Why so stubborn?

Sometimes, I'm getting annoyed by it because she's kinda telling me that I still don't have the right to know and it's kinda disappointing because I look like a useless friend to her. I just want to help her because I can't stand seeing her like that (it looked like a romance novel eh?). Anyway, though she's still doing that, I just try to understand her because I know that she has her own reasons and I should just stay still and wait until she tell it to me.

As a human (lol), I'm also faking my happiness sometimes. Well you know it can't be help because were worried and stuff as I mentioned earlier. I'm afraid of telling them what I feel because I might be bothering them or I'm afraid on what they will say.

You know the feeling that people thought that you're very optimistic and happy all the time, but after all deep inside of you, pain and loneliness disturbs you. You want to tell them but you can't because you have the feeling that they will not understand your situation and might worsen. So you have no choice but to fight it by yourself. Well, these kind of things are common but...

http://static1.gamespot.com/uploads/original/159/1590344/2813543-8292384897-wrong..jpeg

THAT'S TOTALLY WRONG!!! Even though it's right but it's really WRONG! I realized that hiding your pain can't bring happiness to other people especially to your friends. Why? Because they will be annoyed or disappointed because they feel like you don't trust them and it's a bad thing. And according to research, faking happiness or hiding your pain can be bad to your health (heart and mind specifically). Faking makes you more unhappy and it makes you more miserable. And if you knew that you're bad at hiding then STOP HIDING IT'S ANNOYING! *wew* (real talk there). You're just making the world live in deep lies and also yourself.

If you are thinking of faking your happiness, please think first about what would happen at your surroundings. Is it a good thing or a bad thing? Second, think about your friends. They might look at you as a selfish person because you don't share your problems. Friends (the real ones) loves to hear your problems and cry (due to the reason of having problems in other things not to them)in front of them because they could feel that you trust them and that's a good thing.

And before I end my post, I will leave you quote:

https://meetville.com/images/quotes/Quotation-Ty-Gray-motivational-yourself-feelings-inspirational-hurt-integrity-Meetville-Quotes-110239.jpg

4- Me, Myself and I

"Taking walks by yourself."

Did you already experience being left alone? For example, you and your friends planned to have a hang out and you'll meet in a specific place. And then that day comes you're waiting then they will text you that it will be postponed. Annoying isn't it? It's really irritating because they didn't tell the day before the hang out (paasa in Filipino term). 

http://giphy.com/gifs/snow-alone-jROJ92MWLTvmU

My friends and I decided to have our last hang out (despedida for the Filipino term) because my friend (let's name her as Kuro) will be leaving the Philippines and will be studying to Japan. I have the hard time to deal with my schedule because, on that day, I'll be taking my entrance examination in Asia Pacific College (APC) and it's 12:00- 1:00 P.M. Eventhough it's hard, I'd still tried to catch up. Our exam ended at 2:00 P.M because we still waited the results (and gladly, I passed!). But still, I have a problem. The travel time to Magallanes to Santa Rosa Laguna is 2 hours depending on the traffic. Kuro can't roam around when it's already 4:30 or 5:30 P.M. I've texted them that I'm on my way, but then they're not replying (it's annoying actually because I've texted 5 consecutive texts). When I got in Paseo de Santa Rosa, I went first to Santa Rosa Estates (where Kuro lives), and talked to the guard if he could give my gift to her. He called first the house (specifically whoever person at that house), and then he passed it to me. Kuro's auntie said they are at Jollibee, so I went there excitedly.

http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/220/d/1/walking_shizuo_by_pappis-d45uhl8.gif

I went there and they were not there (boom! gets?). And then I felt dizzy, well it's because I'm hungry and at that time I still don't know how to order a food at Jollibee (eventhough I'm a fourth year :PP).
I really have no choice but to order for the sake of hunger (lol). After I ate, I walked around Paseo de Santa Rosa ALONE.

Paseo De Santa Rosa Garden
http://heart-2-heart-online.com/

 
When I walked around the garden of Paseo, I saw many couples there and I feel like I want to shout at them "WALANG FOREVER!!", Well, it's because I'm alone and lonely. I like being alone but I hate feeling lonely, did you get what I mean? haha! Anyway, at the end I've given up because nothing will happen if I will wait for them longer. And when I got home, they've chatted me and they we're sorry (ugh).




I'm really sulking at that time and I'm so angry because they didn't texted me that they already went home. I really feel pitiful when I've roamed around there, expecting that they would come.
And there we have it. My tragic ending  for my post for today! The moral lesson here is to never expect something because it will hurt you in the end, just like what happened to me.