7- The Bullies

"Why do other people love to bully others?" 

Bullying. Bullying have been part of our life as a human. Everything around you have bullies. Everyday, there will be an incident of bullying. Just why? Just why those other people love to bully? Do they have reasons? Are they bored of their life?

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Bullies always tries to search for people who they could overpower, because they think that a person won't do anything about it. They always target the weak people, the powerless people. Why don't they just bully the same level as them?

Well, there are many reasons why a person bullies other people. And I will share to you 5 reasons why a person bullies:

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1. Social issues
People gets more social recognition for negative behaviors than for positive ones. Also, jealousy and envy and lack of personal and social skills to deal with such feelings can also be a reason why a person bully. People think that they are cool if they were to bully other people. They want to be recognized, that's why they bully.

2. Having power
The reason why a person bullies is because they have power and authority. They want to wield their power in a noticeable way. But it's also true that people may be given power without being trained in the leadership skills that will help them wield it easily.

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3. The Bully's Personal History
A person bullies other people because they wanted them to know the pain they have experienced. It's more like a revenge and you do it to others. Because some bullies have been bullied also in their past time, and they suffered a lot from it. And then the day come to them, and they've changed.  They want other people to suffer also.

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4. Family issues
Families that are not warm and loving and in which feelings are not shared are more likely to have children who bully, either within the family home or in other places in which children meet others. It is also prone to produce bullies when discipline and monitoring are inconsistent and a punitive atmosphere exists.

5. Reflection of their own self-worth
Low self-esteem may not be the leading cause of why people bully, but it is still an important reason to consider. Some people have experienced bullying by their peers themselves and then turn around and do it to someone else in order to feel better about themselves. They seem to feel the ability to show power over someone else because it will prove their self-worth to others.

Bullying happens not just because a person is bored or something. It's just that they have their own personal problems. Maybe, they don't intentionally want to bully other people, but because of their friends' influence, they are forced to do it. Sometimes, we should be considerate of them too. We could might help them as well. But, for those who are bullies. Don't take this as an advantage. You might get punish or you'll end up regretting consequences...

Remember:

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6- Maintaining Happiness

"Keeping yourself happy"

What a nice topic we have here today! It could also be related to our last topic. "Smile At Your Own Risk

Ah happiness, what is happiness? According to research, happiness is a emotional state of well-being defined by positive emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. Happiness comes in your own actions and it's not something that's ready made. The best happiness you could ever feel is that the ones you're not expecting (did'ya get it?). It is not made to hide and to be fake. It is made to change a person from depression to contentment.

Most of us wants to be drown deeply in solitude because they have given up on making themselves happy. But then, for those people who are like that. "PLEASE, DON'T GIVE UP!". There's still light upon the vast darkness. No matter how miserable you are feeling at the moment, if you look back, there have surely been events in your life that have made you happy. When good things happen, we feel positive emotions- like excitement, relief, pride and of course happiness. These feelings are essential for our well-being.

But the problem is, happiness doesn't actually last. Psychologists call this phenomenon hedonic adaptation- the idea is that no matter how good something makes us feel, most of the time we get to back where we started. But then again, there is still some ways to avoid this kind of phenomena:

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1. Look at the man in the mirror
You must be true to yourself. Build your life on solid ground. Be concern, not only to the happiness of the others but also to yours. Get to know with yourself first than other. You might make others happy, but what about yourself? Are you feeling happy too? So that's why it's important to reflect yourself for you to able to maintain your happiness.

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2. Seek a contented mind 
In order for you to maintain happiness, you should find contentment to yourself. We all have a conscience that says, somewhere deep inside us, does not feel right. Be sure to listen to it. If you're not contented with your life, then you'll not be able to feel true happiness.


3. Take action steps to change your life

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Do what you need to do to have the kind of life you want. You have to move in order for you to find happiness. Sitting there and staring will gain you nothing but solitude. There's no person (happy person) who are just sitting and staring (unless you're "high" or "crazy"). They always do something that will satisfy themselves. They will do anything, in order for them to be happy. So you should do like that also. Join your friends, don't be so KJ (kill joy). I know you can do it!

 4. Be patient, a fast life is not usually a real life
"Don't rush things." as our Technical Writing professor said. Just be patient. Nothing will be good and successful if you rush things too much. Especially when it comes in finding your partner.Those people who are bitter and saying "WALANG FOREVER!!" are the ones who have rushed in a relationship. They ALWAYS THOUGHT that he's/ she's the ONE.(Maraming nawawala sa maling akala!!) And they will give everything for that person and in the end, they will break up. Well it's because they rushed things too much. Even if you feel that you love him/her already, it doesn't mean that you will give everything to him/her. It's like you stab a knife at yourself. Learn to wait, don't be bored. Always think positively and excitedly.

5. Give up perfectionism
If you insist on perfection, you will unavoidably suffer on poor self-esteem. After all, whatever you did, you could have done better. But the thing is if you want to get everything done then you are going to let some things go- even if they are not perfect. Happiness doesn't occur in a perfect plan. Sometimes, those unexpected moments or plans are the most memorable happiness that happened to you. You know, just go with the flow.